Topical topic

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ROBO Pop
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Topical topic

Post by ROBO Pop » July 30th, 2018, 10:37 am

so in the 9 + years I've been roaming here, we've had thousands of conversations on a wide range of topics and even strayed wildly, but not once have I seen this topic brought to the top of the pile, and yet it is an important one for us to discuss. Why hasn't it been broached in the past, could it be we are afraid to voice it out loud? Are we just avoiding the discussion so we don't have to face reality?

Well me being myself, I'll raise the topic, I ain't afraid. After all it's something I often ponder and maybe it's time for this motley crew to have a scholarly conversation on this topic for the benefit of all who come after.

How do you determine the best size urn for someone? Is it important to get one to match what they plan to wear, the color of their eyes, their standing in society...well? :cool:
Broken Heart
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luvmydogs
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Re: Topical topic

Post by luvmydogs » July 30th, 2018, 10:46 am

Well, since I always wear something bright to funerals (I don't do the dark, dismal thing), I would suggest getting the gaudiest urn you can find. You will always be the conversation starter - or the elephant in the room.
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ROBO Pop
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Re: Topical topic

Post by ROBO Pop » July 30th, 2018, 10:55 am

does size matter? lmao4dx
Broken Heart
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mykidsmom
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Re: Topical topic

Post by mykidsmom » July 30th, 2018, 11:04 am

well i just happened to be here writing a new topic when this popped up...and your right..its never been discussed before now..although i have had some questions but just never voiced them..thanks for bringing this up..im sure many like me will be delighted to get our thoughts off our chest..

so my poor dad passed away in the early 90s....here in canada wed brought him here to live with us...but since he didnt have many personal friends here and certainly none who were buried here, i had a plan......keep him in his URN untill either willie or i pass away and at that point scatter his ashes with ours in some really pretty lake with a nice view..(this has been chosen..) so the funeral home passed back his ashes in a plastic bag in a black plastic box......they weighted about a lb to 1 1/2lbs.....

so this is where the issue started on where to actually place these ashes...we looked at urns from the funeral home and my kids didnt feel any of them reflected their granddad...and they suggested we take a day.....go shopping...and pick out something appropriate we all could agree on.......good idea eh....so off we went..much debate and checking and we really didnt see anything we liked so we decided to go for lunch.....then suddenly our 3 year old goes....MOM MOM look.......and of course the kids got to the window of the store before willie and i did...and we discovered what they were looking at and all going ohhhh and awwww....at..a medium size cookie jar with a huge pink heart....the decision was made...it was totally appropriate and very much something my dad would have chosen.....so here we are 25 years later...my dad in his cookie jar has moved houses with us several times right now hes sitting on a cupboard in my kitchen to the right of me as i type...hes involved in everything, he gets lifted and dusted a few times a week... a couple of times a year he gets taken out to the garden, we toast him with a drink...and let him enjoy the air...hes still very much part of our family....a couple of times i thought its time to scatter his ashes but the family outvote me..hes still waiting until hes got a partner in crime to be scattered with him... my dad had a fantastic sense of humor and im sure if he can look down..hes looking and laughing....and happy he wasnt put in a cemetery with a shit load of strangers......what do you think?
I think.....Therefore I am.!!!!!

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mykidsmom
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Re: Topical topic

Post by mykidsmom » July 30th, 2018, 11:17 am

Let me introduce Pepe (Patrick Michael Byrne) to the Group.
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TruckerRon
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Re: Topical topic

Post by TruckerRon » July 30th, 2018, 11:27 am

ROBO Pop wrote:
July 30th, 2018, 10:55 am
does size matter? lmao4dx
I'm waiting for a woman to answer that one. After all, they're the ones who'll have to deal with it all since they tend to live longer and they're usually in charge of all interior decorating decisions.
TruckerRon -- Received Minion I on 17 Sep 2009, Minion II on 26 Jan 2015

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mykidsmom
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Re: Topical topic

Post by mykidsmom » July 30th, 2018, 11:34 am

Im so sorry ron..but im still caught up on your last post...and watching wondering about you watching your urethra pass planets into your garden hehe..
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ROBO Pop
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Re: Topical topic

Post by ROBO Pop » July 30th, 2018, 12:09 pm

OMG, don't you worry someone will reach in for a cookie and grab a handful of dad, and not by the hair either?
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mykidsmom
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Re: Topical topic

Post by mykidsmom » July 30th, 2018, 2:02 pm

which is why i have him stashed up high hehehe......cos you never know exactly what could happen in this house give the crazies i share a house with
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TruckerRon
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Re: Topical topic

Post by TruckerRon » July 30th, 2018, 3:30 pm

mykidsmom wrote:
July 30th, 2018, 2:02 pm
which is why i have him stashed up high hehehe......cos you never know exactly what could happen in this house give the crazies i share a house with
That puts me in mind of an episode of Night Court...

Ashes to Crashes:
A man named Herb dies, and his two daughters get into a fight over his ashes, ending up in Harry's court. They eventually resolve their differences and agree to stand by whatever arrangement Harry decides upon. Herb's remains are left at court, in Harry's office, leading to the following dialog:

Harry: *Opens Urn, Finds It Empty* Hey, this thing's empty!
Art The Repair Man: Oh that, yeah I'm sorry, Your Honor, I had to use that herb tea to test the coffee maker.
Harry: Art, this wasn't herb tea! This was Herb!
[they look over and see Dan standing at the coffee maker, his mug frozen against his lips]
Dan Fielding: *Spit Take*
TruckerRon -- Received Minion I on 17 Sep 2009, Minion II on 26 Jan 2015

Non-ischemic cardiomyopathy
Medtronic Viva XT CRT-D
No shocks yet...
My intro is at: http://www.icdsupportgroup.org/board/vi ... 099#p57099

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ROBO Pop
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Re: Topical topic

Post by ROBO Pop » July 30th, 2018, 3:56 pm

mykidsmom wrote:
July 30th, 2018, 2:02 pm
which is why i have him stashed up high hehehe...
:duh: okay the more sensitive among us close your ears. Locating women's boobs up high didn't work out well either... lmao4dx
Broken Heart
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Ozchrissy
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Re: Topical topic

Post by Ozchrissy » July 30th, 2018, 5:55 pm

This is very relevant to me at the moment. We have just had new legislation bought in in March this year, which has changed a lot of stuff relating to medical care when facing death. I am in the process of going through the reams of paper and filling out the forms. I even had the conversation with my daughter Lauren yesterday. The hospital where I had my valve inserted, have already mentioned that they would like to be able to examine me to get a first hand look see at how the valve held up. Both Lauren and I agree this is ok, and actually it will take a lot of pressure off her. They will whisk me away and then return me when they are finished, all processed and probably in a box like you said Helen.

I definitely am of the opinion that I won't be there, and it is only for those that remain behind that need to be happy with these arrangements. So it will be up to Lauren as to where she puts me, or the style of jar I am put in. I of course want an ARTSY one, or if she so wishes, to be scattered at my spot by the Lake. This cuts out the formal funeral, and she can remember me in any way she likes, if that is at a bbq or a memorial service, the choice is hers. I won't be there, so she is the one who matters at this time.
“I am not what happened to me, I am what I choose to become.” Carl Jung

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Oesophageal Cancer, 2012, Gall Bladder & Septicemia 2014 resulting in VFib and severe heart damage
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mykidsmom
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Re: Topical topic

Post by mykidsmom » July 30th, 2018, 11:14 pm

ROBO Pop wrote:
July 30th, 2018, 3:56 pm
mykidsmom wrote:
July 30th, 2018, 2:02 pm
which is why i have him stashed up high hehehe...
:duh: okay the more sensitive among us close your ears. Locating women's boobs up high didn't work out well either... lmao4dx
well having these bouncy things so close to your chin can be an issue hehe
I think.....Therefore I am.!!!!!

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codman59
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Re: Topical topic

Post by codman59 » July 31st, 2018, 6:30 am

I had told my wife awhile ago that putting my ashes in an old beer bottle box would be fine with me. She balked at this idea, saying there was a chance she might want to display them on the mantle, seeing as we just bought a fireplace. So I countered with the fact we almost always have beer boxes on display here, but she seems to be stubborn on this one.... like she's really gonna display my ashes anyway....
Nope, I want my ashes dumped at one of my favourite haunts as a youth and young man; won't bother saying as I don't wanna get in an environmental argument.
Really though, I'll be gone anyway. I think having my ashes in an urn on display is just a hindrance to her moving on. that's my 2 cents.
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mykidsmom
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Re: Topical topic

Post by mykidsmom » July 31st, 2018, 8:40 am

come on Craig.....how long have you been married for god sakes.....dont you know your wife has to preserve a certain dignity and social status among the neighbors....and how tacky would a beer case be hehehehe.,..


Mind you...im on the same page as chrissie..when your done your done..so i really dont care what they do its their decision and theyve gotta settle it so they get some comfort...thats assuming theyre sad hehehe cos that might not be the case...

I made the ultimate decision on my mothers funeral when she passed away at 42, i was 21 AND sorta brainless so i did what the extended family wanted..buried her in glasnevin the biggest cemetery in dublin..what a mistake that was for many reasons...i really wish i could go back and undo it...taking my fathers and my sisters wishes into account only...they were on the same page as me.
I think.....Therefore I am.!!!!!

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