OT -- At Your Bedside

Posts from Jan. 1, 2018 to the present. Plus important announcements. (ICD warning sounds)

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TruckerRon
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OT -- At Your Bedside

Post by TruckerRon » March 14th, 2019, 10:25 am

Each day I, like many seniors, start the day by checking the obits to see if I'm there. As I've skimmed over them I've noticed certain phrases repeated, like:
  • Passed peacefully in his sleep
  • Gained her wings last night
  • Passed surrounded by her loving family
That last one has me wondering how I want to go. It'll no longer be at the wheel of a big rig, and this device in my chest has already paced me out of several potentially deadly events when I was peacefully sleeping.

Image

It's becoming apparent that I'll most likely end up in a hospital or hospice bed waiting for the end... So, will I want to be surrounded by my loving family? Will I want to spare them the event? Will I want one last chance to tell off my son-in-law?

More importantly, what do you want for yourselves?
TruckerRon -- Received Minion I on 17 Sep 2009, Minion II on 26 Jan 2015

Non-ischemic cardiomyopathy
Medtronic Viva XT CRT-D
No shocks yet...
My intro is at: http://www.icdsupportgroup.org/board/vi ... 099#p57099

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mykidsmom
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Re: OT -- At Your Bedside

Post by mykidsmom » March 14th, 2019, 2:54 pm

Love this RonDaRon...heres what i was thinking though...my bedside will be empty of awaiting mourners hehee..cos i'll already have pissed everyone off by then ...you know that internal radar that makes you keep your mouth shut??? well mine is lost...i cant control the voice in my throat anymore... lmao4dx

Mid glass of wine with a few decent inhales of tobacco would be a good way to go for me....location being unimportant...... kick butt

I think it might be presumptuous to assume i'll be getting wings hehehe
I think.....Therefore I am.!!!!!

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Ozchrissy
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Re: OT -- At Your Bedside

Post by Ozchrissy » March 14th, 2019, 5:31 pm

This of course has been on my mind as well recently Ron. I really want to be in a controlled environment, mainly as I don't want the shock to hit someone I love. I have had positive experiences with my family when they passed, and it is a PEACEFUL experience for me at least, that is just from my perspective.

Personally I have experienced that peace surrounding me and the resignation to just let it progress further. That was prior to Christmas and I was in Hospital, but I really just gave myself over to what was happening with my body. The crisis passed because of the drugs I was on I suppose, but it was not a stressful experience, and I felt that when I was alone in the room, there was not a cast of thousands at my bedside. So I believe it is not us personally we need to worry about, but those that love us.

I believe that we cannot limit who wants to be there with us, it is also their journey in life, so they have to do what they want.
“I am not what happened to me, I am what I choose to become.” Carl Jung

Diagnosed with cardiomyopathy in 10/99
LBBB & VT diagnosed Feb 06
Guidant Biventricular Pacer ICD inserted Feb 06: Boston Scientific Incepta CRT-D inserted May, 2012
Oesophageal Cancer, 2012, Gall Bladder & Septicemia 2014 resulting in VFib and severe heart damage
Bare Metal Stent May, 2012 Mitral Valve replaced 2015
Meds: Entresto, Bicard, Coralan, Eurtorxsiq, Frusehexl, Spiractin, Sigmaxin, Creon, Warfarin,
Appropriate Shocks for Ventricular VFib.

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mykidsmom
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Re: OT -- At Your Bedside

Post by mykidsmom » March 14th, 2019, 6:31 pm

well i really dont want anyone peering at me as im gasping my last breath......they can go do something interesting.....like fly a kite....my last moments wont be sad..ive lived a great life...and ive exceeded all expectations on expiry dates...ive had enough drama to last 5 life times..so when the time comes.....im ready....and i dont want to be made feel guilty for finally expiring..those i love know this, so really those id want around would be my kids grandkids, son in law whos one of my own and my ever loving suffering husband willie..thats if they were up for it...if they werent....well they know i love them more than anything...i cant go an hour without expressing my feelings so theres no hidden secrets....and my job will be done.. oh...and a tiny sip of wine if theres time and a smoke would be great ...i know this might sound funny..but im totally serious
I think.....Therefore I am.!!!!!

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ROBO Pop
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Re: OT -- At Your Bedside

Post by ROBO Pop » March 14th, 2019, 9:38 pm

In the end, I don't think we get a vote in how the final scene plays out. I just hope my exit is dignified and I am still smiling when they close the curtains on stage. Of course all those who love me will be present, that is to say I'll be alone. I do plan to haunt a few select members here for grins.. golf2

Just don't forget to raise your toilet seats in a 21 lid salute as I float by.
Broken Heart
Nobody has ever survived life, but I'm trying...
My story and sticking to it
http://www.icdsupportgroup.org/board/vi ... 97&p=91375

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TruckerRon
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Re: OT -- At Your Bedside

Post by TruckerRon » March 14th, 2019, 10:37 pm

ROBO Pop wrote:
March 14th, 2019, 9:38 pm
In the end, I don't think we get a vote in how the final scene plays out. I just hope my exit is dignified and I am still smiling when they close the curtains on stage. Of course all those who love me will be present, that is to say I'll be alone. I do plan to haunt a few select members here for grins.. golf2

Just don't forget to raise your toilet seats in a 21 lid salute as I float by.
Something like this?

TruckerRon -- Received Minion I on 17 Sep 2009, Minion II on 26 Jan 2015

Non-ischemic cardiomyopathy
Medtronic Viva XT CRT-D
No shocks yet...
My intro is at: http://www.icdsupportgroup.org/board/vi ... 099#p57099

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Ozchrissy
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Re: OT -- At Your Bedside

Post by Ozchrissy » March 14th, 2019, 10:46 pm

Oh Ron, I don't know how you find these but this is brilliant. Thank you, you have made my day. I can see Robbo's spirit in the background, but he got a fright too. :runn: wavhi :big-hug: lmao4dx lmao4dx lmao4dx
“I am not what happened to me, I am what I choose to become.” Carl Jung

Diagnosed with cardiomyopathy in 10/99
LBBB & VT diagnosed Feb 06
Guidant Biventricular Pacer ICD inserted Feb 06: Boston Scientific Incepta CRT-D inserted May, 2012
Oesophageal Cancer, 2012, Gall Bladder & Septicemia 2014 resulting in VFib and severe heart damage
Bare Metal Stent May, 2012 Mitral Valve replaced 2015
Meds: Entresto, Bicard, Coralan, Eurtorxsiq, Frusehexl, Spiractin, Sigmaxin, Creon, Warfarin,
Appropriate Shocks for Ventricular VFib.

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TruckerRon
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Re: OT -- At Your Bedside

Post by TruckerRon » March 15th, 2019, 12:22 am

Ozchrissy wrote:
March 14th, 2019, 10:46 pm
Oh Ron, I don't know how you find these but this is brilliant. Thank you, you have made my day. I can see Robbo's spirit in the background, but he got a fright too. :runn: wavhi :big-hug: lmao4dx lmao4dx lmao4dx
I've been told that I have an excellent memory for things I've seen. I can draw accurate maps of truck stops I've stayed at... at least the ones that haven't remodeled extensively and moved things around during the past 10 years. That memory made it easy to return to customers already knowing which side to approach their docks from. I'd just call ahead to confirm the appointment time and find out if there was any new road work going on.

Now if I had the other sort of memory to put names to familiar faces...
TruckerRon -- Received Minion I on 17 Sep 2009, Minion II on 26 Jan 2015

Non-ischemic cardiomyopathy
Medtronic Viva XT CRT-D
No shocks yet...
My intro is at: http://www.icdsupportgroup.org/board/vi ... 099#p57099

Stella Blue
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Re: OT -- At Your Bedside

Post by Stella Blue » March 15th, 2019, 6:53 am

Well, you lot have probably now scared off at least 50 new members, but it was definitely worth it! Helen, your comments reminded me so much of my mother (she was just 39 . . .). Truly, the day before she passed she sat out on her balcony enjoying a smoke and a Jack Daniels before settling down in her room with the hospice folks. Even before that, she had the cardiac care team at the hospital writing one glass of Jack Daniels into her daily care regime (no smokes, though!).

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mykidsmom
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Re: OT -- At Your Bedside

Post by mykidsmom » March 15th, 2019, 6:41 pm

oh my gosh stella id have loved your mom...a girl after my own heart and the same age as me too eh......my plan is to go out as ive lived my life.....enjoying every second....and your mom clearly thought that too ...im glad she got her drinkie and a smoke....


robo i know we cant exactly order up our custom made departure arrangements...but if i could mine would be a cardiac arrest...omg what a way to go...and i say this from experience lol...one second light...next......well nothing.....im not overly worried about how or where it happens..i know my kids have had several trial runs....so they will handle it..each in their own way and differently....but ive every confidence in them because other than one kid they are all pretty sensible...and he doesnt talk to me anyways cos ive already done the mental damage to him with the trial runs lol.....willie now i worry about because his mission in life is to escape before me.....aint happening if i have anything to do with it .......
I think.....Therefore I am.!!!!!

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ROBO Pop
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Re: OT -- At Your Bedside

Post by ROBO Pop » March 15th, 2019, 8:20 pm

Whatever...just ensure River of Dreams is playing (Billy Joel) for me and I'm good
Broken Heart
Nobody has ever survived life, but I'm trying...
My story and sticking to it
http://www.icdsupportgroup.org/board/vi ... 97&p=91375

slk123
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Re: OT -- At Your Bedside

Post by slk123 » Today, 9:11 am

I'd love to have my children with me but it will be up to them. I'm not sure if 3 of them are strong enough to see me pass. I'm thinking they will be in the next room. I'm hoping to die because of an SCA, but when I was in the hospital right before I was to get my ICD, one of the nurses asked since the ICD would save me from another SCA, how would someone like me die. The doctor said it would probably be due to kidney failure or cancer...… if it does come to either one of those, I'm thinking I could have the ICD turned off and then stop taking my meds. Maybe that would induce an SCA???
Best wishes,
Stacey

CHF Jan 2016
ICD Nov 2014
LBBB Nov 2014
Sudden cardiac arrest Nov 2014
Arrhythmia Aug 1982

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TruckerRon
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Re: OT -- At Your Bedside

Post by TruckerRon » Today, 11:39 am

slk123 wrote:
Today, 9:11 am
I'm hoping to die because of an SCA, but when I was in the hospital right before I was to get my ICD, one of the nurses asked since the ICD would save me from another SCA, how would someone like me die. The doctor said it would probably be due to kidney failure or cancer...… if it does come to either one of those, I'm thinking I could have the ICD turned off and then stop taking my meds. Maybe that would induce an SCA???
Image

That's something that we normally don't talk about in our support group. BUT it is something most of us have thought about at times. Having the D function turned off in my CRT-D is something I'd consider IF my life was approaching its end due to such diseases. And many of our heart-related medications do have warnings about stopping them abruptly. So, such a thing might work... but what if it didn't work as planned? What if the outcome of stopping the drugs was worse than death, like a debilitating stroke leaving you trapped, unable to communicate or take care of yourself?

Obviously you'd want to find someone who knows more than I do about such things.
TruckerRon -- Received Minion I on 17 Sep 2009, Minion II on 26 Jan 2015

Non-ischemic cardiomyopathy
Medtronic Viva XT CRT-D
No shocks yet...
My intro is at: http://www.icdsupportgroup.org/board/vi ... 099#p57099

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Ozchrissy
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Re: OT -- At Your Bedside

Post by Ozchrissy » Today, 5:08 pm

Stacey, Ron as you know I am facing this dilemma now. I had a LONG chat the other day with my Boston Scientific Technician who I have been dealing with for the past 6 years. I was talking to him about the last days, and there is no issue with the D being turned off on the device, but he said that the rest of the functions need to be turned off as well. Mine is a CRT-D and he presumed at the start that I knew that my heart would slowly die, as in my pulse would go very low, and the device would bring me back up. This was something I was not aware of, I always like you presumed that it would be an SCA, but apparently it is the opposite. As for the meds, I wouldn't stop them as quickly as I am taking Warfarin and that could almost guarantee a stroke and the unknown consequences.

I had reason to talk to him on these occasions because I felt something which I presumed was a fast rate, but when he looked I had dropped very low. So at the moment when I get my turns and I know the device is kicking in, it is not from the fast but the slow heart beat.

Now this is heresay but is as I heard it from the tech, but it is worth clarifying with your cardiologist or tech. I have decided when I am in need of Hospitalization that is when I will have the device turned off. Not before.
“I am not what happened to me, I am what I choose to become.” Carl Jung

Diagnosed with cardiomyopathy in 10/99
LBBB & VT diagnosed Feb 06
Guidant Biventricular Pacer ICD inserted Feb 06: Boston Scientific Incepta CRT-D inserted May, 2012
Oesophageal Cancer, 2012, Gall Bladder & Septicemia 2014 resulting in VFib and severe heart damage
Bare Metal Stent May, 2012 Mitral Valve replaced 2015
Meds: Entresto, Bicard, Coralan, Eurtorxsiq, Frusehexl, Spiractin, Sigmaxin, Creon, Warfarin,
Appropriate Shocks for Ventricular VFib.

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